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FUN CONTESTS
The Contest Center 59 DeGarmo Hills Road Wappingers Falls, NY 12590 |
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From time to time the Contest Center holds a Fun Contest. These
contests are always creative, requiring imagination and humor.
Some excerpts from past Fun Contests appear here.
We invite you to submit your own contributions to any of these contests. The deadline for a prize may be past, but your contribution and your name will be added to this webpage. |
Full Alphabet
Write a sentence of 26 words where the words begin with the 26 letters of the alphabet in order.
A battle can develop eating for good health, in just knowing light meals need overseeing, possibly quelling restraint, since temptation usually varies when Xmas yields zest.
-- Marilyn R. Venable
As Bill Clinton dutifully entertained foreign gentlemen, Hillary's insurance jumble kept losing momentum; neatly overturning promised quick reform, senators took up vociferous waffling x-ing yearlong zeal.
-- Louise Charles
A boss can drive employees frantic, generating huge impossible jobs, keeping lists, making notes of people's quirks, reducing staff tactlessly, using various worker xenagogues, yelling "Zounds."
-- Doris M. Armstrong
A beautiful carrot does entice folks galore, however, I just keep liking my nutrients odder, pretty queer really, specifically those ugly very weird XL yummy zucchini.
-- Darlene Duval
A big crew drove elephants from good habitat in jungle kingdom leaving many noisy ones pushing, quite roughly, several truly upset veterinarians who xrayed young zebras.
-- Betty R. Brennan
Same First Letter
Construct a sentence of up to 12 words where every word starts with the same letter.
Clever Contest Center contestants conquer clever Contest Center contests.
-- Grace Byrne
Contest Center creates clever challenging contests causing contestants congenial competition.
-- Betty Battaglia
Barabara Burns buttered bread better because Betty Benson broke bread badly buttering.
-- Phyllis Barr
Frugal freeloader Freddie found financial fame finagling funds from former friends.
-- Rae Anne Hoffman
Strutting strapping striking stranger stripped straying struggling strapless streetwalking strumpet strewing street.
-- Bernadene Gortler
Awful Albert Alligator acted abominably and ate angelic Alice as an appetizer.
-- Ruth Lobrovich
Timid Timmy tried two tequilas, then three... tiger Timmy then terrorized the townspeople.
-- Walter Soeder
As Ark animals assembled, an anxious aardvark asked, "Are ants abundant?"
-- Phil Sphicas
Tiny Tim tiptoed through the tulips, then toddled towards the trees.
-- Mildred C. Olson
Quarrelsomeness quelled, quickly quarantined quaking Quasimodo quit quibbling, quietly quilted, quaffed quinced quiche, questing quiescence.
-- Fred K. Irwin
The trucks tread through tree trimmings, traveling through the trails to the tundra.
-- Casey Klaviter
Add A Letter
Construct a sentence, then add a single letter to change its meaning.
No humans can live on the moon.
Now humans can live on the moon.
Public assistance funds were disbursed to an undeserved community.
Public assistance funds were disbursed to an underserved community.
The Fun Contest is the best of them all.
The Fun Contest is the beast of them all.
-- Mrs. O. P. LeBoeuf
The optician's office is a site for sore eyes.
The optician's office is a site for store eyes.
-- Doris Armstrong
The pianist was experiencing problems with her spine.
The pianist was experiencing problems with her spinet.
-- Doris Armstrong
The debtor's argument was structurally sound but unconvincing.
The debator's argument was structurally sound but unconvincing.
-- Steve Lent
Dealers usually don't have difficulty with addition problems.
Dealers usually don't have difficulty with addiction problems.
-- Steve Lent
The donated items were reused.
The donated items were refused.
-- Darl Sandstedt
The astronauts were interviewed to discover what lives on a spaceship were like.
The astronauts were interviewed to discover what olives on a spaceship were like.
-- Darl Sandstedt
Don't forge his signature on that contract.
Don't forget his signature on that contract.
-- Bernadene Gortler
You always run everything.
You always ruin everything.
-- Bernadene Gortler
The woman, who was eighty, had trouble getting into a taxi.
The woman, who was weighty, had trouble getting into a taxi.
-- Louise Charles
The suspect is still eluding the arresting officer.
The suspect is still deluding the arresting officer.
-- Michie Kuwaye
3-Letter Words
Construct a sentence consisting entirely of 3-letter words.
You may vie for the new job bid, but you may not win.
Her new pie pan was now old and not fit for use.
The man who had the top job was Tom Mix, but now it's Amy Tan who has the big job.
You who yap off for the new tax use law, zip the lip. -- Bernadene Gortler
Maj. try new Uzi for spy job. -- Judy Keith
It's new, it's you, it's Fly Dye! -- Judy Keith
Use pro for the new tax law. -- Henry Durchfort
Awe for the new tax law won the CPA his new job. -- Louise Charles
You try for the new CPA job, but fib the tax law. -- David Schachter
Use the jug for ice. -- Shirley Utz
Celebrity Marriages
When two people marry, the woman's new name can be funny, ironic, or perhaps unfortunate. For example, my son once dated a girl named Robin. If they had married, she would be Robin Rubin.
Choose two (or more) famous people whose marriage would result in an interesting name.
For example, if Shelly Long married Elton John, she would be Shelly Long John. If she divorced him to marry Ron Silver, she would then become Shelly Long John Silver.
Edie Gorme, Peter Cook: Edie Gorme Cook -- Al DeStefanis
Kitty Carlisle, Conway Twitty: Kitty Twitty -- Nellie Trosclair
Lucille Ball, Bert Parks, Neil Diamond: Lucille Ball Parks Diamond -- Roger Snead
Glenn Close, Regis Toomey: Glenn Close Toomey -- Eugene Jarosch
Karen Carpenter, Jackie Mason, Christopher Plummer: Karen Carpenter Mason Plummer -- A. E. Bartusch
Leontyne Price, Franz Liszt: Leontyne Price Liszt -- David Schachter
Marsha Mason, Ivan Dixon: Marsha Mason Dixon -- David Schachter
Glenn Close, The Doors: Glenn Close The Doors -- David Schachter
What's My Line?
Find or make up a name, and give a suitable profession. [Real names and actual matching professions are marked with a *. The others are invented.]
*Ima Bumgardner yardman. Wanda Shelton
Nick O'teen tobacco grower. Judy Barnes
Brer Abbott head of monastery. Judy Barnes
*Mr. E. Coldflesh *mortician. Mary Woodman
*Dr. O. Yankum *dentist. Mary Woodman
Robin Banks stick-up artist. Dorothy Algmin
Marcus Down discount retailer. Dorothy Algmin
Tab Lloyd journalist. Beatrice Cecil
Spacing
Write a sentence in which the same sequence of letters is used two or more times, but divided differently to form different words.
Manslaughter will surely end a man's laughter.
We want to get her together with her friends. Bernadene Gortler
Sign in a beauty salon: If your hair is not becoming you should be coming to us. Pauline Catlin
I gave my cat a tonic, but she became catatonic. Dorothy Algmin
If your friend's hip it will improve your friendship. Waldina Mahler
When we met, had one hero in my life admitted he was on methadone as a heroin addict, I would have admired his honesty. Roger Snead
I put the disc on so late the music was unable to cheer my disconsolate mood. Roger Snead
Product Pitch
Change one letter in the name of a common product, and then write a slogan of up to 10 words.
Liston Tea - The tea that packs a punch.
Mudweiser - Here's bud in your eye. J. Philip Copsey
Four Noses - A nose is a nose is a nose, etc. J. Philip Copsey
Coven Girl - Bewitching makeup. Doris Christensen
Mixwell House - Coffee you never need to stir. Betty Battaglia
Irish Sprint - For people on the go. Betty Battaglia
Sin Maid Raisins - We give new meaning to the Grapes of Wrath. Dorothy Coombs
Vidal Bassoon - For that woodwindblown look. Dorothy Coombs
A-2 Sauce - Our spices try harder. Dorothy Algmin
Betty Crocked - Try our rum cake - often. Fred Irwin
Corn Flukes - If there's any nutrition here, it's an accident. Fred Irwin
Newsweak - Rumors, gossip, and unreliable sources. Mary Templeton
Hidden Words
Write a sentence or brief paragraph containing a hidden message, or hidden words with a theme.
I dare not scan twilight skies. Eery phantoms beckon me, thin ghoulish apparitions. To Mecca? Nirvana? Nay, outposts of Hades.
Hidden message: I can't see a thing, can you?
Sally Kirtland
My chimp is happy on display, full-garbed in finery.
He'll toot a pipe, tap a drum, he'll even strum on key.
Hidden message: Impish playful pet monkey.
Sally Kirtland
Liver and asparagus? To keep women joyful stop and ask Uncle Vernon. To wit, he agrees!
Hidden message: Clever pandas enjoy verandas with gusto.
Marcia Kasper
Pardon this advice, the best Arkansas hay is vital! One snake died without it. So hone your scythes for haying.
Hidden message: Don't sashay stark naked alone, honey.
Marcia Kasper
The self-centered contestant from Coventry was puzzled and embarrassed. She knew she misspelled lacrosse, shadow, nuptial and swordfish.
Hidden message: Contest Center News puzzle entry, across, down, word.
Bev Vestal
So, be erratic, you can't win every time.
Though few ate raisins, also dates, all ate a lemony lime.
Hidden message: beer, wine, water, soda, tea, ale.
DeWitt Pierson
When I leave a valuable package with a messenger I always insure it. Care does pay off, especially a lucky charm.
Hidden message: Nile, Thames, Red, Yalu.
Howard Lindquist
Watson,
Am sending a messenger with a footlocker containing "The Scarab Ring Mystery" mementos. The trap is to leave immediately.
Holmes
Hidden message: Game's afoot. Bring pistol.
Arthur Conan Doyle
Car Trouble
You just bought a brand new car. Halfway home the car stalls and you cannot restart it. Choose, or make up, a word or phrase to describe this situation.
» In-stall-ment.
» Car-rage-us.
» Shop and Stop.
» G.T.O. - Get your Tools Out.
Lisa Via
» The stall of the riled.
Betty Battaglia
» Car-diac arrest.
Jeffrey Miller
» Ponti-yuck.
Charles Rawnsley
» I should have bought a V-8.
Edna Fetzer
» Indignition.
Dorothy Algmin
» LTD - Long Time Dead.
William Dewey
» Shove-Bug.
J. Philip Copsey
» Car-bage.
James Skelton
» TOW be or not TOW be.
Betty Battaglia
» Not-so-hot rod.
Jeffrey Miller
» Hyun-die.
Charles Rawnsley
» Hitchback.
Dorothy Algmin
» FORD - Fix Or Repair Daily.
Charles Prosser
One Letter
Write a sentence, then change only one letter to make another sentence with a substantially different meaning.
» The wild party in the frat house was a private affair.
» The wild party in the frat house was a primate affair.
» The sheriff has proof that you are not a murderer.
» The sheriff has proof that you are now a murderer.
» Julius Caesar was the greatest Roman of them all.
» Julius Caesar was the greatest Woman of them all.
» Use Spiffy Skin Lotion and you will always be lovely.
» Use Spiffy Skin Lotion and you will always be lonely.
» The late king's unpopular eldest son will be crowned today.
» The late king's unpopular eldest son will be drowned today.
» Nobody knows the trouble I've seen.
» Nobody knows the trouble I've been.
» New Year's Day is the morning after the night before.
» New Year's Day is the moaning after the night before.
Lyn Venable
» The stockbroker relayed the news to the client.
» The stockbroker delayed the news to the client.
Betty Battaglia
» Try hard and you can get what you want.
» Cry hard and you can get what you want.
Dorothy Algmin
» The candidate was a political force.
» The candidate was a political farce.
Dorothy Algmin
» After my friends retired they started puzzling.
» After my friends retired they started guzzling.
Wanda Shelton
» The farmer milked the goats twice a day.
» The farmer milked the gnats twice a day.
Joseph A. Fleischmann
» The rowers depended on oarlocks to keep the boat moving.
» The rowers depended on warlocks to keep the boat moving.
A Good Job
Complete the thought: Did they do a good job fixing your .... ?
Did they do a good job fixing your car?
Yes, now I can ride to the poorhouse in style. -- Tish McElhannon
Did they do a good job fixing your car?
Yes, now I don't need to buy firecrackers. -- Waldina Mahler
Did they do a good job fixing your car?
Yes, now if the traffic's heavy I can just scoot under it. -- Grace F. Smith
Did they do a good job fixing your lawnmower?
Yes, now I'm a cinch to win the Indy 500. -- Waldina Mahler
Did they do a good job fixing your pet frog?
Yes, now when I take its shirt off it says "Don't ripit, don't ripit." -- Bob Lawson
Did they do a good job fixing your computer?
Yes, they found the "worm" in my Apple. -- Charles Rawnsley
Did they do a good job fixing your windows?
Yes, now I get cross-ventilation even when they're closed. -- Beverly Palter
Did they do a good job fixing your TV?
Yes, I always loved silent movies. -- Eleanor Lowe
Did they do a good job fixing your fishing reel?
Yes, but there was a catch to it. -- Elizabeth Masterson
New Product
Invent an imaginary new product, and write an advertising blurb for it.
The S Cape: Add magic to your wardrobe. Slip this on and be transported to glamour land. -- Dorothy Algmin
KaraTea: The drink with a belt. -- Dorothy Algmin
Offense by Sophializ: A new resistible fragrance for the irresistible woman who demands her privacy. -- Sally Kirtland
Spleen: The new magazine for discontents. It features all you should know about malpractice suits. Attorney listings in Appendix. -- Sally Kirtland
Y'All: Try this heavy-duty detergent guaranteed to get all the mud out of football uniforms in Outer Magnolia. -- Marilyn Venable
Madnight: Wear this new perfume and your boyfriend will go crazy over you. -- Marilyn Venable
Hootch Embalming Fluid: Drink plenty of this regularly and you'll stay well preserved. -- Patricia Bradley
Cheeriodical: Read this new magazine containing no depressing articles or news. -- Marilyn Venable
» And the winner, a full decade before minoxidil and Rogaine
Bald Tonic: Use this tonic on your head. Roots of hair begin to spread. Bald before, hair today. Baldness gone, hair to stay. -- Mrs. W. J. Everhart
What's My Line?
Describe a new occupation for the new millennium (5 word limit).
» Time machine operator.
» Environmental repairperson.
» Interspecies interpreter.
Future Product
Devise a new product for the future. (5 word limit).
Fake moon dust Make your friends think you've had an expensive vacation on the moon. Just sprinkle a little on your shoes and pants cuffs.
Fake Earth dust Make your friends think you've had an expensive visit to Earth. Just sprinkle a little on your shoes and pants cuffs.
First Half
Write a sentence using only the letters in the first half of the alphabet (that is, A through M).
» Ah, dad baked a cabbage cake, did he?
» Legal eagle alleged chemical leakage flammable.
Headlines
Find a humorous headline in a newspaper. It may be intentional humor or an unexpected second meaning.
» Homes going begging -- Nellie Trosclair
» American S&L Takeover by Bass Expected -- James R. Skelton
» New banks store clients' own blood -- James R. Skelton
» Chips will fall where they may in bovine bingo -- Phyllis Nicholson
» Keyes may open doors in Green Bay -- A. E. Bartusch
» Sizzling city burns up heat records -- A. E. Bartusch
» Scientists grow frog eyes
» Police search for hacker responsible for ILOVEYOU virus
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